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  • Writer's pictureAlex Planidin

Nobody is coming to save you



Many years ago, I asked the Godfather of Coaching, Steve Chandler, to coach me.


Initially, he said yes, but when I told him why I wanted coaching, he changed his mind - and gave me the best coaching session I'd ever had.


Here is the email exchange:


----


Hi Steve,

I would greatly benefit from coaching to give me a kick up the backside, hold me accountable, and see past the clutter.


How does this work? Do you take Mastercard? Is it $xxx lump-sum up front? Gosh, it's frightening. From here I don't see how I can pay this back on top of my current outgoings. But that's why I'm asking for help in the first place.


Alex


..


Alex


 I do not recommend coaching

as a way to get you external motivation.

And I especially don't recommend it if

it causes financial stress to get coaching.


I recommend relaxing into the power

you already have......


Best,


Steve


---


"relaxing into the power you already have...."

How are you supposed to receive that?


I thanked Steve and our communication ended.


I thought I was motivated, but my self-esteem was at an all-time low. My stress was evident and more debt would have created more of it.


Steve was right. I was looking outside for validation and not seeing any.

My message - who I was being - was basically "I'm unemployable, will somebody help me?"


And strangely enough, I wasn't being swamped with offers...


Eventually though, I did relax enough to rediscover the power I already had. It turned out I had plenty of skills to offer (though I realized "employment" wasn't my thing). A new confidence appeared, my income soared, my marriage was transformed, and I didn't look back.


So Steve's lesson was essentially "Nobody's Coming", and I really needed to hear that. Again. In this slightly shocking way.

 

More recently I've got clear on what I want to create and have invested plenty on getting excellent coaching to help me become the person who can do this.


But I still value Steve's simple lesson. So thank you Steve Chandler for that loving, and priceless, coaching session all those years ago 🙏


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