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  • Writer's pictureAlex Planidin

It’s my bat, dammit


Discovering my power to choose


I truly must become

The captain of my own ship


And only now do I see

that to be true


Though I've glimpsed it before


It is so clear

so obvious


That it's only from here

In this space


Allowing this space

to be

to expand

to permeate

my being


Only from here

Can these walls crumble

Again and again


These thoughts and circumstances

That "trap" me


Are inventions, creations


That I GIVE POWER TO

With my attention



THEY DO NOT EXIST AS PROBLEMS UNLESS I GIVE THEM THAT POWER


My thoughts cannot limit/affect me


UNLESS I LET THEM HAVE THAT POWER BY BETRAYING MY POWER/ABDICATING MY POWER


THE ONLY POWER I HAVE


The only power I have


As a human

Is the use of my own mind

I can choose how it is directed


Goodness me

HOW DEEP THIS GOES!!!


I must always remain here

HERE

My only true home

Where my attention belongs

Where I AM


Then turning the levers, pushing the buttons

WITHOUT ANY ATTACHMENT/FEAR CONNECTED TO THE RESULT/"LACK" OF RESULT


The language colours the commentary


Any hint of judgement/praise/criticism

Tastes of attachment


IDENTITY


And then we're on the slide again!!

LIKE SNAKES AND LADDERS


Every single time

I fall for it :)


But I learn to recognise the slide

Even if not the fall


And then I start watching out for the trap doors more closely


WHAT STARTED THIS ENTRY

Was the captain of the ship image


And also

As Steve C says


Life throws tests at me

Like debt


And I can choose

I CAN CHOOSE

Whether I give up my power

Abdicate


And hand over

My power

(Which I do have, incidentally)


To that external energy

Give them the power


It's like handing over the baseball bat

MY BASEBALL BAT


NO


That's what the STAND means

That's what the SWORD means


NO


THIS IS MY POWER

MY DIVINE RIGHT

NO MORE

BUT ALSO, NO LESS


THE POWER TO DECIDE

WHETHER THE BAT STAYS IN MY HANDS

OR WHETHER I JUST GIVE IT UP, HAND IT OVER

OUT OF FEAR


AND THE BEAUTY OF GRACE, THE TRUE BEAUTY

IS THAT I CAN TAKE BACK MY BAT, MY SWORD

AT ANY MOMENT


IT IS ALWAYS HERE WAITING FOR ME


WHEN I REMEMBER

THAT IT'S MY BAT


AND I DON'T BAT FOR JUST ME


I BAT FOR HUMANITY

FOR CONSCIOUSNESS


I CANNOT HURT A FLY

I CAN ONLY USE IT FOR GOOD


TO KEEP AWAY THOSE FEARS AND IMAGINED GHOULS

BECAUSE I HOLD MY BAT

I HOLD IT


I DECIDE WHO COMES IN

WHO MOVES IN AND TAKES OVER THE HOUSE

WHO SHITS ON MY LAWN


IT'S MY BAT

GOD GAVE IT TO ME


SO THAT I COULD BE FREE


AND SO I COULD WORK ON MY SWING


AND HIT HOME RUNS FOR HIS TEAM, OUR TEAM

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