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  • Writer's pictureAlex Planidin

Honouring your inner voice

What we're doing here is listening deeply to the voice inside,

We're listening deeply to this little voice more and more openly.

And we are trusting that this voice is the truth.

And when everything else, everything I have learned, everything I have been told from outside contradicts this,

I still listen to this voice, I hold space for this voice.

And the more I do this, the more I start to experience being alive, being complete in a different way, I experience being me.

I experience a sense of truth that is not something I can necessarily write down or something that is fixed.

It is a source of truth, a source of light.

Probably unknowable and yet, it is purity.

When I allow it in, it burns off. Its purity just burns off all of the tensions, all of the ideas and thoughts that I am believing and I am holding on to without actually knowing it.

So instead of analysing and categorising and cataloging the things I am gripping onto, the things I am trying to change in my life, which creates more tension, creates more discontent.

Instead of all of this, I am trusting that the unknowable informs.

It is only that.

It creates such a sharp contrast that I see the futility, the pain and the misery that holding on to do all of these beliefs, engaging in battle on this field, produces.

So what are we doing here?

We’re living into staying true, to gently allowing our attention to rest on this truer, lighter form of energy.

And it takes commitment because so much of us has no interest whatsoever.

Because it is not a thing in the way that other things are.

Things come from this but it is the unformed to my ordinary mind that thinks and lives in the world of form and things that are already created.

This, that seems to be so unknowable, has little value if any.

And it is quiet, it is very quiet and in a noisy world where we are given more options, more strategies, more ideas, more things that we wish to do, more opportunities to do more things…

As the external becomes more and more multitudinous.

That is our focus.

So it is difficult in the beginning just to sit with what seems not to be there.

But in time this silence becomes more available to me.

If I am lucky I might have a very special experience.

Which helps to show very clearly that who I think I am in all of my thoughts, all of the associations, all of the ideas I have about myself are just creations.

And they could easily be created as something else.

So this is extraordinary work and as I tune in and I then feel the impulse to share what it is that I'm experiencing.

So there starts to build this tension between a message or a state of being that I know for myself is true.

And I know for myself that this is how I wish to live.

And as I take this out into the world, even in the smallest interactions, I see how my automatic habitual reactions and behavior take over very quickly.

If I am lucky I can even see I have a sense of the automatic behavior kicking in.

And then within seconds I am no longer aware of this quiet connected part of me anymore.

And if I am lucky it will come back, when I'm alone or maybe if I have an interaction with somebody or listen to somebody who needs something that speaks to this level.

And so I can set an intention when I am quiet.

And it doesn't matter whether it goes according to plan.

What matters is that this truth as I experience it is making an outreach in a loving way in a very detached way.

I am not doing it in order to achieve something.

I am simply expanding the circle in which it exists and which I am able to be here with it.

And it's home. It's beautiful.

It's always sensitive to others, sensitive to myself.

If there is tension inside, I am able to allow the tension to be.

And so this quiet just has a neutralising power.

And I need to be careful that it doesn't become just this or I don't become just a wish to maintain a certain state of quiet and presence in my body.

It's a warm bath and it's loving.

But we are here in life and there's something even finer actually than this glow of presence.

Because what / who is it that is actually aware of it?

There is an awareness that is able to encompass both.

And a fine attention is needed to see this awareness come and go. And this is a little closer to who I really am.

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